West Side Story

I only watched this for Rita Moreno who played Anita in the 1961 version. I still don’t understand why this remake was made. The one thing I liked about this version was the change they made to the scene where Anita almost gets raped. Moreno’s character saves her (in the 1961 she is saved by a male store clerk) but here she tells the boys they grew up to be rapists. In the 1961 version the male shop keeper just asks them to leave.

6/10

Marry Me

Jimmy Fallon has a bigger role in this than most of the film’s supporting characters. Also, this is an exceptionally cute romcom. Anyone who was around 20 years ago remembers how big Jenny from the Block’s singing and acting careers were, she was everywhere! Show me a dance group that did not have their own dance routine to Let’s Get Loud. The biggest problem of this film is the lack of chemistry between J.Lo and Maluma. Also, apparently Maluma was 27 when they filmed this, and I don’t know how old J.Lo’s character is supposed to be here, but I’m guessing not 27 and this film failed to show what possibly their characters could have in common, apart from fame and music that is. I spent most of the film trying to figure out which of the many songs J.Lo sings in this she performed on The Voice back in November, and then when it finally came on, it clicked instantly. I also laughed a few times, including when someone commented on one of the character’s many instagram lives ‘What’s wrong with this guy’s nose?’ at Owen Wilson’s nose. All I can say is, my mom will love this film.

7/10

Eve’s Bayou

This film made me feel grateful to be a Millennial, aka the last generation to have spent their childhood outdoors and not on their phones. I mean, I did spend most of my time in front of the TV, but I did hang out a lot outside too. And then when we finally got phones, we would buy ringtones and wallpapers from magazine covers, boy, those were the times. Little Eve is played by Jurnee Smollett, Michelle’s best friend on Full House. Roger Ebert called Eve’s Bayou the best film of 1997 and gave it 4/4 stars, and it truly is an exceptional film.

8/10

Sing 2

They’ve cast Pharrell Williams in a non-singing part, what’s the logic there? Sing 2 is significantly weaker than the first film, as I mainly enjoyed the competition show, (duh I’ve seen all 21 seasons of The Voice after all), which was the main story in the original, but it’s still a fun kids film featuring songs from Aerosmith, Taylor Swift, Alicia Keys, Drake and Ed Sheeran to name a few. Also how good is Reese Witherspoon’s singing voice? This made me want to rewatch Walk the Line, or you know, Sing.

5/10

Zulu

Almost forgot this was expiring from HBO Go today and I promised my dad we’d watch this. I’m taking a class on exoticism in cinema and the mass wedding scene at the beginning of the film where dozens of naked African women dance with much older African men they have never met, is the definition of both exoticism and orientalism.

6/10

The 355

I have been a huge fan of Jessica Chastain since her wonderful performance as the sensitive and vulnerable Celia in The Help. The 355 is a fun spy film starring not one, but five strong female leads. There is also a fair share of queerbaiting, which I didn’t mind at all. The one thing I didn’t like is the ugly dress they gave Jessica to wear in the first action scene. What was that awful pattern? And the hideous colour?

7/10

Studio 666

Naturally, as a massive Foo Fighters fan since the 90s, I had to go see this at the cinema. Studio 666 is funny and gore, and I would have totally believed you if you told me Rob Zombie directed this (he didn’t). Dave Grohl got John Carpenter to make a cameo and Carpenter also volunteered to compose the theme music for the film. Foo Fighters kicked ass in this musically, as they always do. I remember when I got my first electric guitar as a kid, and ordered a custom made strap that said ‘Foo Fighters’ in some wacky font, just so I could pretend I was a member of the band as I played those famous riffs (poorly, but still). I have not touched a guitar since 2013, when I moved out, and my mom sold it without telling me, because she was struggling financially. That experience traumatised me, but I do believe I will pick up an electric guitar sometime in near future. I have so much of the band’s merch in my house, it’s crazy. Also, I am so ready for album number 11. And just as one of the characters in the film, I would have also yelled the lyrics to Best of You at the top of my lungs if I ever met the legend.

7/10

The Woman in the House Across the Street from the Girl in the Window

This was the most unrealistic thing I’ve seen in a while. It made zero sense. So this is how dreadful Veronica Mars would have been if she had no detective skills? Couldn’t we just get another season of Veronica Mars instead? Anyway, all I want to know is if Kelly Clarkson texted her bestie Blake Shelton when she saw the picture of one of the characters kissing Blake’s Sexiest Man Alive People Magazine cover. I bet she did.

4/10

And Just Like That… The Documentary

Sex and the City was not about the sex, it was about the friendship and the city, and this documentary made it seem like it was all about fashion. It should have been called And Just Like That… The Fashion.

5/10