Monthly Archives: December 2016

30 Best Episodes of Fall 2016

29 Thursday Dec 2016

Posted by in american horror story, fuller house, gilmore girls, greys anatomy, how to get away with murder, special victims unit, this is us, tv series, younger

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Fall 2016 definitely wasn’t TV’s best season, to be honest, it was more of a ‘snoozeville all the way through. I must admit, the season felt incomplete without Scandal, Nashville, The Good Wife, Downton Abbey and Castle, but at least we got Shameless four months early.

  1. Gilmore Girls A Year in the Life: Fall
  2. SVU 18.04
  3. Fuller House 2.12
  4. Shameless 7.11
  5. Greys 13.09
  6. Gilmore Girls A Year in the Life: Summer
  7. Fuller House 2.11
  8. Greys 13.08
  9. The Goldbergs 4.06
  10. The Middle 18.01
  11. This Is Us 1.01
  12. Shameless 7.10
  13. The Middle 8.05
  14. How To Get Away With Murder 3.09
  15. Gilmore Girls A Year in the Life: Spring
  16. Greys 13.05
  17. This Is Us 1.04
  18. American Horror Story 6.06
  19. Gilmore Girls A Year in the Life: Winter
  20. This Is Us 1.02
  21. How To Get Away With Murder 3.05
  22. Younger 3.12
  23. How To Get Away With Murder 3.04
  24. The Middle 8.05
  25. Greys 13.04
  26. How To Get Away With Murder 3.08
  27. Shameless 7.02
  28. The Middle 8.02
  29. Fuller House 2.10
  30. American Horror Story 6.01

4 episodes of The Middle, all 4 episodes of Gilmore Girls, 4 episodes of Greys, 3 episodes of Fuller House, 3 episodes of Shameless, 3 episodes of This is Us, 2 episodes of SVU, 2 episodes of American Horror Story, one episode of The Goldbergs, and one episode of Younger

Shows watched that didn’t make the list: Scream Queens, The Simpsons and The Good Place.

I haven’t had the time to catch up on Transparent, so I may add an episode or two to the list in January.

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Shameless 7.11. The Middle 8.07. The Middle 8.09. Shut Eye 1.01. This is Us 1.02. This is Us 1.03. This is Us 1.04. This is Us 1.05

28 Wednesday Dec 2016

Posted by in shameless, shut eye, the middle, this is us, tv series

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Shameless 7.11

Mickey made it to Mexico, but without Ian. Debbie signed up for junior college to study welding. And Monica died.

The naked wedding.
It was beautiful.
Yeah, if you’re a pedophile.
Drinking turns the volume down. Makes the world more tolerable.
Sing fucking Taylor Swift, I don’t care. Get out of the fucking car.
Kev, you misspelled the word resume on your resume.
They help you rip off movies.
I forgive you for promising me to that drug dinner.
Your old lady’s downstairs, eating cat food.

10/10

The Middle 8.07

But your mom is my lady.
First, she’d have to explain what audacity means.
Everyone there was dark and tense.
You may not be deep or dark, but the world is already full of darkness.
It’s not you that wasn’t ready for New York, it was New York that wasn’t ready for you.

5/10

The Middle 8.09

Now I’ll just have to be a bridesmaid for Cindy and wear a formal dress and a Safari hat. I’ve researched grounds for marriage annulment in the state of Indiana. There’s not being of age, suspicion of fraud, if one or both parties are mentally unstable.
Bingo.
That one.

10/10

Shut Eye 1.01

Kadee Strickland is wonderful in it!

Got a guy who owes me, fuck that, he’s the guy.
God came to the gypsy guy and told him that his theft had saved Jesus from the nail in the heart. To repay him, God gave the gypsies the right to steal.
Cause they’re bitches. Bitches are assholes.
I’m done being someone’s bitch.

9.5/10

This is Us 1.02

The eating disorder plot of the show is what keeps it all special.  Castle’s Esposito married his best friend’s wife, played by Mandy Moore’s character. At this point we don’t know where Jess from Gilmore Girls is.

They call him Webster, you know that show where white family adopts a black baby?
I love that show!
Can we spend one fat-free night?
Man, I only ate fruit today.
I wasn’t a good brother, was I?
It’s okay, you still have time.
Randall is not free of vice, his vice is his goodness.
It’s his compulsive drive to be perfect.
It’s always gonna be about the weight. Even when I’m not thinking about it, I’m thinking about it. Will this chair hold me, will this dress fit me. It’s just at the core of who I am, deep inside.
This dress fits you in all the right places.
This old thing? I just threw it on. I didn’t even think about it.

10/10

This is Us 1.03

We should give him a new name.

6/10

This is Us 1.04

Children are just heartless, and I absolutely adored Milo’s reaction.

I was so nervous I started doing a British accent in the middle of it.
We don’t want you to play with us anymore. You embarrass us.
I almost drowned, do you even care? You’re so busy making sure that Kate isn’t eating too much and Randall is not too adopted and where’s Kevin? Oh wait, he’s dead.
Do you think my son could play with your son sometime after school?
So you stalked her like a serial killer.
Do you want to be with a skinny person?
All of your life you’ve been fat.
I gained 90 pounds the year after she left.
I did consider suicide, a lot.
I had this little notebook and every time I met a black person, I would put a mark in this notebook.
The fact that my daughter doesn’t find anything weird about her playing a snow white, that’s the whole idea.
He’s my biological father.

10/10

This is Us 1.05

Milo’s character is dead?

When I get a script, the first thing I do is paint.
Our dad is not with us, he’s not alive anymore, but he’s with us, he’s with me every day.It’s just us.

5/10

SVU Season 18 So far

20 Tuesday Dec 2016

Posted by in special victims unit, tv series

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This is how I rated the show over the first 4 months. Surprisingly only 6 episodes aired this half season, and lets be honest, not all of them were good.

  1. 9.5
  2. 5
  3. 8
  4. 10
  5. 10
  6. 3.5

Giving us a total of 46 points, divided by 6 episodes = 7.7/10

Some of the best episodes of the season so far included episode 1, when a little boy points a gun at Olivia and her son at Central Park and episode 4, when we find out Amanda’s sister Kimmy suffers from bipolar disorder

The best moments and quotes of the season include:

  • Olivia’s ‘fed up with perps’ attitude from episode 1
  • A teenager is obsessed with Amanda and lied to please her and Amanda said it was not her fault he has a crush on her
  • A mom decides to sleep with an admissions officer to get her son into a prestigious university, what’s worse, the man turns out to be a con
  • ‘He thinks that because he’s in love with a transgender woman that he’s gay.’

Shameless 7.10. The Middle 8.08. The Goldbergs 4.09. The Goldbergs 4.10. Scream Queens 2.07. Scream Queens 2.08. Scream Queens 2.09. Younger 3.11. Younger 3.12. The Simpsons 28.09. The Simpsons 28.10. Divorce 1.10

17 Saturday Dec 2016

Posted by in divorce, shameless, the goldbergs, the middle, the simpsons, tv series, younger

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I watched season 1 of Damages, it was so long and boring, I decided to quit when the main murder got resolved as the result was just disappointing.

How did you like Fuller House? Wasn’t season 2 so good? Kimmy stole the spotlight yet again. There has to be a third season.

Shameless 7.10

There’s something about this season that makes it not so enjoyable. They’re not pulling enough ‘shameless’ fast ones. Sure Frank slept with Fiona’s elderly friend with dementia. Debbie did beg on the street and Monica did take a baseball bat to the other grandparents house, but what about Ian and Lip? Lip kept proving everyone he’s Frank’s son, Carl disappeared off to military school (wtf he was just in juvie last season) and Ian was the only one who had his shit together and dates a nice transgender man. Fiona’s storyline is boring, Frank’s too, Kev and Vi’s is just plain awful. Why did they move this season 4 months up only to give us this disappointment. Where the fuck is Sheila, we need her.

Mickey is back and he is heading to Mexico. Oh yeah and Monica is back too. I rememeber her having that meth selling boyfriend last season but what the f happened to her lesbian lover? Frank and Monica rob a Bingo bus and try to rob a bank too. They writers made it look that Lip’s teacher is responsible for his drinking problem as he ended up drunkinly breaking into her home. Despite all this craziness, Ian said something right on point.

I’m nuts. Mickey’s fucking nuts.
I’m on CTP. Colored people time.
Love is raw and destructive.
Milkoviches? I think one of them robbed us back in the 80s. If the cops pick up the Milkoviches, tell them we want our VCR back.
Am I stupid?
Fuck her, you’re a sweetheart.
That OJ lawyer is already dead.
Have you thought what would have happened if you ran off with Jimmy/Steve?
Lying sociopath Jimmy Steve? My life would be a non-stop psycho thriller.
What of nothing ever gives you the same thrill again?
You turned your life around. Mickey would set a match to it. You’ve done really great without him and I’m really fucking proud of you.
Lip, you broke into my home. Jesus, Lip, you’ve got to move one, please. Get some help.

10/10

The Middle 8.08

The rating for The Middle are not the best this season, but It’s still well in the 6mln. Axl and April got married…for one episode. First average episode in ages.

And that weird one that reads.
That one’s mine.

3.5/10

The Goldbergs 4.09

I feel like they have ran out of ideas. The whole season is a snoozeville. Here, Murray has his Birthday and he sleeps through the surprise birthday party Bev threw him. Adam and Big Tasty have a quarell, after Adam starts getting into basketball.

Before you get mad, you should lay down on those coats It’s amazing.
Which baby is this?
The moron.
Wow, these receipts really mean a lot to you.
I  should be in the moment more.
If you start liking basketball, then who am I?

3.5/10

The Goldbergs 4.10

At least we got to hear Hayley Orrantia sing, and she has such a wonderful voice. Love Sick is definitely my most played song in 2016, and I love Unitil Then and Strong and Southern and Silence You and I am waiting for Hayley’s EP.

What am I watching?
The duck is gonna make it with that lady, what have you brought us to?!
A lady and a duck in bed. Who the fuck thought this was a good idea?!
You replaced my favorite posters.
That’s my baby!

3.5/10

Scream Queens 2.07

I saw the ratings and there is no way this show is not getting cancelled after next week’s season finale. Season one was fresh and exciting, and despite being badly written, it kept you occupied after just finishing a new episode of SVU. Season 2 on the other hand? Nothing makes sense, the killer got revealed halfway through, it has so many unnecessary characters, they’re killing off all the original characters and oh boy it just sucks. Grandfathered’s ratings last year were twice as good and the show got canceled. Scream Queens only had 2 million followers per episode, but most likely Fox didn’t cancel it because they wanted to keep Jamie Lee Curtis in the family.

He’s a psychopath and his most likely profession a serial killer.
Most Americans use the same password for everything.
His password is I went to Harvard.
I’m gonna put you on an antiobesity drug called Orlistat.
I’m pretty sure I just saw Hester, yeah, from the Netflix documentary. The head nurse is obviously a drug addict and Cathy Much thinks she’s a doctor.

6.5/10

Scream Queens 2.08

We learned that Grace has been locked up in a mental institution this whole time.

Emma Roberts Snapchatting during sex with Uncle Jesse, oh lord. We all know at least one person who does it and it’s just unappropriate, but here, entertaining.
Are you texting?
Snapchatting.
Snapchatting?
I don’t know maybe take sex classes?
I’ll just lay here listening to Spotify.
During that Katy Perry/Taylor Swift feud, she sided with Katy!
Not when my daughter was locked ypo in a mental insitution because o fwhat they did to her.
You said she went to Stanford.
Stanford Mental Asylum.
How come they get to be doctors while my little Grace gets locked up.

4/10

Scream Queens 2.09

Brooke Shields guest stars just to get poisoned and give the Channels her TV Show.

I don’t want to die in this outfit!
We want to be TV doctors, not real doctors.
I don’t give a rat’s ass about that cow Number 3.
You have 8 hours to complete the exam.
I think the answer is B, better luck next time!
I am  a genius and no one cares.
Damn it, number 5, shut up!
Where’s number 5.
I don’t know, probbaly taking a huge nervous dump somewhere.
We’re not surprised she got poisones. It was probably one of the PAs she fired for farting.
Di you just offer us our own show?
I’ll be dead in a month.

7.5/10

Younger 3.11

Liza and Charles almost hook up and this is how it should be! I wish she just told him the truth right there.

We need to tweet, instagram and Snapchat our asses off this weekend!
Liza, I know you’re 40.
Either you publish my book, or I’ll publish your story.
Advice from her?
No, advice from her dog.
Just put 10 people in a tight corner , take a picture and this party will look crowded too..
My babysitter got me into them.
I like you.

5/10

Younger 3.12

Liza told Kelsey the truth! I didn’t like how or where it happened, but it’s okay. I guess if Josh found out at the end of season 2, Kelsey at the end of season 3, then Charles will when season 4 ends. I hope season 4 starts in early spring.

I’m sure you know how fond I am of you.
They say life starts when you’re 40.
You didn’t consider me at all!
No restrictions, no pressure. This is you. The real you.
What will make you happy?
Losing weight.
What will make you happy?
A divorce!
I just want my wofe back.
Just call her.
You’re a liar and a cheater. Your lies are hurting everyone around you.
This is my daughter, she’s in college. And ‘m not 26. I will be 41 in a couple of weeks.
I don’t undrstand.
Then let me explain.

10/10

The Simpsons 28.09

This episode was a blur. I don’t remember much of it, except for Homer getting injured at work after Mr. Burns throws him down his chute.

SueSA.
How could I have forgotten to sue Mr. Burnes?

4/10

The Simpsons 28.10

Oh boy, at least Maggie kicked some elf’s ass.

1/10

Divorce 1.10

Robert called cops on Frances! The only good thing about this episode. The daughter is hit by a car and no one even tries to tell the son not to blame himself, they just chat about it among themselves. This is what’s wrong with the show.

2/10

This Is Us 1.01. The Goldbergs 4.08. Younger 3.09. Younger 3.10. The Simpsons 28.08. Divorce 1.07. Divorce 1.08. Divorce 1.09

11 Sunday Dec 2016

Posted by in divorce, the goldbergs, the simpsons, this is us, tv series, younger

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This is Us 1.01

I have found my new Parenthood! Woah what a great show! I cried through most of it, just like during Parenthood! It’s beautiful and I was nicely surprised with how the three storylines are connected! It’s the best show this Fall.

Average human being shares their birthday with 18 mln other human beings.
Do not dare eat this cake before your party, Kate. Love, Kate.
Seriously, what is wrong with you?
This is a low point.
How did I get here? How the hell did I get here? I had this whole dream life that I have imagined for myself. A real career. Look at me, Kev. I ate my dream life away.
Tell me to stop feeling sorry for myself. Tell me to lose the damn weight!
Lose the damn weight.
I’m gonna lose the damn weight.
You want to be fat friends?
Sure, but I’m gonna lose the damn weight.
I can’t fall for a fat person right now.
I’ll lose the weight then.
You want to meet your grandchildren?
I have a thing for Sally Field.
I am 36 and this is not a very pretty picture.
This is the funny fat guy from fat class?
Yes, I am and it’s a support group.
We lost the third baby, I’m very sorry. He was stillborn. There was nothing anyone could have done.
You have two beautiful healthy children. A boy and a girl, but we did lose the third child.
Which one is yours?
None of them, someone left a newborn in my fire station.

10/10

The Goldbergs 4.08

Beverly becomes Erica’s Home Economic sub teacher and Adam gets one of the leads in Phantom of the Opera.

I don’t follow.
Neither do I, I lead.
She’s been scraping and couponing just to save enough money for you to go to any college you chose.

5.5/10

Younger 3.09

What is happening to this show, this season is awful.

I’ve never bought a bathing suit from a vending machine.

1.5/10

Younger 3.10

Oh sweet lord, so it CAN get even worse?! Point for the pregnancy dilemma.

0.5/10

The Simpsons 28.08

What is this chore monkey app and where can I get it?!

Isn’t it a little sexist to expect me to do all the carpeting?
You are finishED.
You should use the Chore Monkey app. People do all your chores and you’re free to follow your dreams.
This is the beginning of an unhealthy dependence.
I wouldn’t say it was a hostage situation.
I bet you wish you were back in your kitchen.
I am in my kitchen.
Then life is good. Am I right?
For you, I’ll get one without a criminal record.
You made that for me?
No, used to be OJ’s. Yeah, little Juice!
He calls my buttocks, ass.

7.5/10

Divorce 1.07

A family member taking out loans was very relatable, all of it.

What was that about every morning, the giggles, the big smiles, and the hi Robets, the extra shots, the obvious bent over to pick up a dime that you’ve dropped for my benefit.
He has left you both deep in debt.
He also took out some loans.
He remorgaged your house and then he took more loans.
I don’t deserve this.
You purches a two bedroom that was a siht of a triple homicide, yes or no, Rbert?
It’s the fact that you gambled your kids future!

5/10

Divorce 1.08

One good enough episode and we’re back to this? Sarah rolling her eyes as Robert saiid every day is special with his kids. The show reminds me of SDwx and the City not because of Sarah Jessica Parker, but because of all the sex references.

She’s a slut, drinking water cause she’s so thirsty from all the good fucking she’s gotten.
As a French men would do.

2/10

Divorce 1.09

Roberts is served with divorce papers at his daughter’s game.

There’s only ne guy here who doesn’t look like he cries when he comes.
We’re all sitting here with dicks in our hands.
You condensating fuck.
You dirty puta.

3.5/10

The Middle 8.05. The Middle 8.06. How To Get Away With Murder 3.09. SVU 18.06. The Goldbergs 4.07. American Horror Story 6.10. Younger 3.06. Younger 3.07. Younger 3.08. Scream Queens 2.05. Scream Queens 2.06

10 Saturday Dec 2016

Posted by in american horror story, how to get away with murder, scream queens, special victims unit, the goldbergs, the middle, tv series, younger

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Didn’t you just love season two of Fuller House?! Expect a post on it very soon. I haven’t posted for two weeks, because I have been too tired from crying over Gilmore Girls. If you want to see my review, check my previous post.

The Middle 8.05

Sue chooses a quite shocking major that made me think of Lorelai Gilmore the minute she said it. Mike beautifully explains to her she needs a good job to avoid the Heck lifestyle and Brick learns how to drive and hits the Orson cow with Axl’ RV.

Anything I should know?
The Lord’s prayer.
I am 15.
I thought you were 12.
Uh! Astronomy!
Should we be concerned about how much we hide from our kids?
Theatre Where’s the future in that?! She’s not good!
Veterinary school? That’s harder to get into than med school!
I’m thinking of adding Criminal Justice as one of my majors.
There’s no inheritance, so you need a job that pays well. You can’t just sign up for everything that looks fun.
The only reason you’re still in school is that Dad sold his half of the diaper business.
If you start digging around this yard in 5 minutes you’ll hit a report card.
I need to pick one major, so tell me what you want me to do and I’ll do it.
What? I’m not gonna do that.
You were never supposed to know. I just didn’t think you had to worry about that.
I don’t want you to be on the first name basis with an operator from the gas company. Even though Joyce is very nice and lets us spread the bill over three credit cards. I don’t want you to have to share a battery between two cars. I don’t want you to hope for a tornado to bring your next appliance. I’m not trying to scare you kid, but it’s hard sometimes living like we do. And what I hope for you is just that it can be different.

10/10

The Middle 8.06

The Hecks eat Nancy’s Thanksgiving food and the episode is hilarious as always.

Other people watch you like a pig, cause you got three scoops.
When Cindy doesn’t get what she wants, Brick doesn’t get what he wants. Reading time.
I didn’t recognize you in youre uniform. Thank you for your service.
No, I don’t have a middle name. Except for Rose.
She’s losing memory, so It’s important we see her.
Or you could just tell her you saw her.
I don’t like her either. Cindy said she could not get a conversation going with her, and Cindy can talk to anybody!
Because I’m responsible for you.
I never want you to stop looking out for me.
So she’s not even related?
Oh no she is to somebody, but not actually to us.
And by the way, not a good babysitte, cause she obviously dropped April on her head a few times!
Try a few hundread times!
Thank you Lord, for the Hecks. The best neighboors in the world.

8/10

How To Get Away With Murder 3.09

I was surprised to see who died. He’s the main character! Bonnie and Annalise almost hooked up and Olly knows about the night of Sam Keating’s disappearance. Police finally finds Rebecca’s body and Wes learns she was murdered.

Junk food is all I’m doing.
I wasn’t high, I was traumatised.
Traumatised from what?
Like you don’t already know.
Social services rescued me and I sescued myself.
You’re fired. Did you not hear me?
You’re the problem with the gay community.
We’re all the problem with the gay community.
Bonnie, who is it?
It’s Wes.
Middleton student identified as fire victim.

10/10

SVU 18.06

Hands down worst episode of SVU ever. They wanted to make another transgender-centred episode and they screwed it up big time, as we were presented with a extremely boring script. Read these to see the only good things about this episode.

Can’t people yse the bathroom they were born to use? Is that really so damn hard?
He thinks that because he’s in love with a transgender woman that he’s gay.
Three lives destroyed all because a woman named Eva was born a boy.
He killed a woman of your dreams.
The single just hit number one. That’s all that really matters.

3.5/10

The Goldbergs 4.07

The fourth Thanksgiving at The Goldbergs was just plain bad.

Everyone, come back! It’s fucking thanksgiving!

2/10

American Horror Story 6.10

Who wasn’t dissapointed with the Lana Winters link or camoeo? The finale to the Ranoke season. I didn’t exactly enjoy it, but the same can be said about the whole season. I hope you understand, that I could’t give it a 10.

Are you sure, it’s not me you love.
But they did die, didn’t they?
Welcome to the Lana Winters special.
You turned everyone else down. Because of you, because of who you are and what you’ve been through. I mean, Jesus. You killed your own son, Bloody Face.
I killed a psychopathic murderer before he could kill me.
Where is she, she was reported missing by her grandparents an hour before we went on the air.
She talks to much.
Sydney didn’t ask me to participate, and as it turns out, fortunately so.
Are you people crazy enough to be shooting another show here?
Lea Harris showed up in the middle of the night.
You stupid fucks, you deserve to die.
Not if Precila ddid to me what you wnat her to do to you.

9.5/10

Younger 3.06

Such a funny episode, more of them I beg of you!

My one desire is to service Charles.
We’re all beginning for more cock.
Look, Nancy Drew and leggier Nancy Drew.
It started as a writing exercise.
She’s someone in the Empirical family, we don’t want her making a relationship with another publisher.
Make the offer, we have to keep him in in the house.
That was a big safe, Liza.

6/10

Younger 3.07

As above, good episode.

It’s difficult to keep a secret, especially when you pretend to be someone else in order to be taken seriously in your profession.
It gets better.
That’s what they say to kids who are severely bullied.
He’s flirting with you through The New Yorker.

5.5/10

Younger 3.08

What a great episode, first one this season! Liza gets hit by a car while trying to return Diana’s city bike and Charles almost saw Liza’s real date of birth on her hospital wristband.

In my experience sex can be nothing and a kiss can mean a lot.
I had to buy extra storage on my Dropbox judt to open te file.
Your bike has been in an accident.
The one they gave me is wearing off. I think they didn’t account for my height.
I’m fine.
The bike is not FYI.
That should have been Becky.
Diana alerted the Empirical legal team and they alerted me.

8.5/10

Scream Queens 2.05

Funny, and overall good, everyone speaks with different accents, possibly the best this season. Why oh why did Jamie Lee say Freddy Krueger instead of Michael Myers?

For the love of God, number 5. Denise is dead could you maybe let us have two minutes that aren’t about you?
I finally  know what it felt like to be Freddy Krueger.
Hello non-doctor idiots. Sorry to interrupt your hard work cleaning bedpans, the only thing you’re qualified at any hospital on planet earth. Sorry, doctor tiny bitch.
These bed pans can wait till we find some less attractive people to clean them.
I’m pretty sure I ordered codde?
You didn’t order anything, this isn’t a restaurant.

9/10

Scream Queens 2.06

There are 3 Green Meanies!?

We’ve lost a lot of blood, so donate yours.
I’m sorry I haven’t welcomed you properly, by having sex with you.
And she’s a serial killer.
She’s a what?!

5.5/10