Tag Archives: horror film

Film Reviews: Gloria Bell. Booksmart. The Secret Life of Pets 2. Aladdin. Ma. Kong: Skull Island. Begin Again

07 Friday Jun 2019

Posted by in Julianne Moore, movies, music

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Gloria Bell

I saw it when visiting my home city and I had that ‘Brooklyn’-movie moment while watching this brilliant film, realising I no longer belong here. The large audience I saw it with tried to ruin the film for me. They were bursting with laughter, alledging the bloke was bulimic and saying ‘this script is so poor’ every few minutes. It didn’t stop me from enjoying Julianne’s performance and the film itself. I liked how his kids were obese and that it was linked to them being loners and not having their lives figured out. And nothing is more fitting than the film ending with Laura Branigan’s version of ‘Gloria’. Sadly, I haven’t seen the original, but I loved A Fantastic Woman and Disobedience, so this was very much for me. I’ve been a fan of Julie Moore since I saw Magnolia as a kid, so naturally, I picked up 2 A1 cinema posters of Gloria earlier this week.

8/10

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Booksmart

I liked it more than last year’s Lady Bird.

9/10

The Secret Life of Pets 2

Nothing more fitting than the first film opening with Taylor Swift’s ‘Welcome To New York’, and this one with Jay Z and Alicia Keys’s ‘Empire State of Mind’. Even if a big part of this one takes place outside of New York. Stay behind after the initial credits for an interesting rendition of Desiigner’s ‘Panda’.

6/10

Aladdin

Scott Weinger’s voice was my favorite part of the animated Aladdin films. I missed it a lot while watching this film, but listening to Naomi Scott sing recompensated some of that loss.

6/10

ma kong begin again

Ma

The twenty teenagers at the screening I went to were eating it up. They were laughing and clapping every few minutes.

5/10

Kong: Skull Island

Black Sabbath’s Paranoid playing at the beginning of the intriguing helicopter scene made my day. I had to rewatch that scene after the credits rolled. But why is Skull Island trying to be Jurassic Park so much? This really didn’t need any creatures other than King Kong.

4/10

Begin Again

Listen, I used to be a huge fan of Keira’s around the Domino/Pride and Prejudice/The Atonement time, but all I got from this movie is that Keira Knightley can’t sing.

3/10

Film Reviews: Jackie. Maniac. The Butterfly Effect. Halloween. Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald. A Family Divided. Christiane F. Strangled. The Nutcracker and the Four Realms

09 Saturday Mar 2019

Posted by in movies, Sally Field

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Jackie

This is the 550th new film I watched this year, and I’m really happy it’s this one. Natalie Portman gave a great performance in this aftermath after John Kennedy’s shooting. She sounded very much like Jackie. Emma Stone really snatched that Oscar from her. The shooting scene was very life-like and may be not be for those with a weak stomach.

4/10

Maniac

Speaking of Emma Stone, here’s a Netflix original series she starred it. It also stars Jonah Hill and the girl from Ozark. I watched it for Sally Field. Sad to report I hated every single one of those alternative universes. And all this nonsense for such a ‘normal’ conclusion? Someone once told me I sound just like Jonah Hill, but I don’t see it? My accent does sound American, thanks to 20 years of watching American films and TV Shows, but I don’t think I sound like him. Congrats to Jonah on his massive weight loss. I know how hard it is to change your lifestyle and never look back. I am currently too scared of loose skin to actually lose the weight.

4/10

The Butterfly Effect

I could watch 2 hours of the first 25 minutes of this film, actually I could watch a whole mini series with these kids from Ashton Kutcher’s charater’s flashbacks.

8/10

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Halloween

It was bloody amazing! We’ve waited so long to see Jamie Lee do another Halloween, and she’s back at it again, 40 years since the first one and 16 years since Resurrection. The most important thing? They completely ignored events from Halloween 20 yrs Later and the ridiculous Resurrection that dared to kill Jamie Lee’s character off. My favorite part of this sequel must be Laurie closing the roller shutters after checking every single room. See you in 10 years?

9/10

Fantastic Beasts The Crimes of Grindelwald

These films are ruining the Harry Potter franchise. At least we got to see Hogwarts. How old was Dumbledore supposed to be in Harry Potter? In 1927, he’s in his 40s. If that wasn’t enough, Professor McGonagall is here too, and she’s in her 30s. Rating would be lower had I not seen it in 3D. Johnny Depp’s acting has gone down hill since the 90s, it’s a shame. He is never getting that Oscar now.

6/10

A Family Divided

I really miss those 90s TV movies about rape that saw a mother or a survivor fight for justice against everyone trying to silence them. Knowing Stephen Collins has been a pedophile his entire adult life ruined my experience with this film. I probably would have liked this film more, had I watched it before 2014. I definitely would not have been so sceptical and angry at the 7th Heaven star. Here he’s covering up his son’s crime. Actually all three men in that family are vile people. As always, Faye Dunaway gives a great perforance and you just route for her the entire film.

5/10

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Christiane F

Just thought of this film out of nowhere for the first time in almost 15 years. Both the book ‘Kids from the Zoo station’ and film were a major hit among kids my age, bigger than Requiem for a Dream. Everyone seemed to be fascinated with it and there was a high demand for the book both in the school and local libraries. It’s a great film too.

8/10

Strangled

This reminded me of that time when the bank sent me on a First Aid course and someone mentioned narcolepsy and this other bloke in his late 60s said ‘that’s when you do it with dead people’ and everyone laughed.

Anyway, this was a pretty good thriller based on a true story.

6/10

The Nutcracker and the Four Realms

Very average and Keira Knightley’s squicky voice was so annoying.

4/10

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Adventures in Public School

Netflix’s worst original right here. Really bad, until the last 10 seconds. The last 10 seconds were sweet. Highly unlikely, but sweet.

3/10

Wreck-It Ralph

When Shut Up and Drive started playing halfway through the film. Also, I recongised Jack McBrayer’s voice straight away, even though I’ve only seen him on The Middle.

6/10

Ralph Breaks the Internet

I thought it was quite good, until Ralph broke the Internet and the film got so boring I fell asleep. Good old Odeon handed out these magnet Instagram photo frames for fridge.

6/10

 

Film Reviews: The Babadook. The Pyramid. The Sacrament. As Above So Below. Nightcrawler

25 Friday May 2018

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The Babadook

The Aussie masterpiece that takes everyone’s breath away. A must see for everyone, not just horror fans.

10/10

The Pyramid

The film does to the pyramids what The Descent did to caves and Jaws to the sea. A father-daughter antropolology team goes into an old pyramid and gets trapped. The film involves sphynks. It was recommended by the late master of horror Wes Craven on twitter and is a must see for horror fans everywhere.

9/10

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The Sacrament

A film crew goes into deep Africa to visit one crew member’s sister and make a documentary about a commune society she lives in. A film from horror’s well known TI West about living in a cult and it’s tragic consequences. – loosely based on the case from late 70s.

9/10

As Above so Below

Another film that didn’t get good reviews but wasn’t as bad as people say. If you loved The Descent as much as you should, this is slightly similar. A group of French people go into the catacombs.

7/10

Nightcrawler

‘I can’t jeopardize my businesses success for an untrustworthy employee.’

9.5/10

Film Reviews: The Strangers 2: Prey at Night. Mom and Dad. Savannah Smiles. Ghoulies. The Trails of Cate McCall. The Night Before. My Girl. Father Figures. Aurora Teagarden Mysteries: Last Scene Alive. Fat Girl. Picnic at Hanging Rock. Sherlock Gnomes. Sisters. The Rachels. Breaking In

20 Sunday May 2018

Posted by in candace cameron bure, Mariska Hargitay, movies

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The Strangers 2: Prey at Night

I’m really disappointed they didn’t use the ‘I Think We’re Alone Now’ song from the trailer, it really is perfect for this. The sequel was alright, but it wasn’t worth waiting 10 years for. Back in 2008 what hit me the most was the eeriness of the answer to the question: ‘Why are you doing this?’ ‘Because you were home’. The sequel did not have any moments like that nor did it know how to create tension. But if you’re into slashers, you’ll like it despite its flaws.

6.5/10

Mom and Dad

Refreshing! Modern horror needs more new ideas, as at this point it’s all heavily recycled. My local cinema showed the trailer for this for 2 months before every single film and then they chose not to show the film at all.

8/10

Savannah Smiles

It has the ‘Smokey and the Bandit’ vibe to it, so I’m all for it. This summer I’m planning to watch every Bridgette Andersen film I can find.

‘She fell out of the car.’
‘Should I call a doctor?’
‘No no no, she’s used to it.’

6/10

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Ghoulies

If you never really liked Gremlins, you will certainly not like this.

2.5/10

The Trails of Cate McCall

I love courtroom dramas, and this was surprisingly interesting!

7/10

The Night Before

I did laugh when the baby said ‘fuck you’, so I guess the film could have been worse.

4/10

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My Girl

They just don’t make family films like this anymore.

10/10

Father Figures

The only thing I actually enjoyed was one of the brothers’ obsession with SVU and Mariska Hargitay.

3/10

Aurora Teagarden Mysteries: Last Scene Alive

Bruce Dawson (John), one of the original members of the Real Murders Club is no longer doing these? Aurora Teagarden films suddenly got… dreadful.

1/10

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Fat Girl

I was warned about the ending… and yet I wasn’t ready.

9/10

Picnic at Hanging Rock

This miniseries is an intriguing interpretation that tries to explain what happened to the missing girls from the book/film by adding new storylines.

7.5/10

Sherlock Gnomes

Another example of where trailer is better than the film itself. They didn’t use the scene where Sherlock accidentaly breaks one of the gnomes while saying he’s there to protect them, and then Juliet says ‘Like the one you just broke’ and the broken gnome asks ‘Who’s broken?, checks his hat and says ‘Holy fertilizer’. There was this little four year old girl one row behind me who screamed ‘Oh no!’ twice and when one of the gnomes fell and we heard it break, she asked her mom what happened and the mother had to explain the concept of death to her. Eavesdropping on how she struggled not to hurt her feelings or scare her was more entertaining than the film. The only good thing is that animation got better than in the first one, face expressions were clearly more natural.

4/10

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Sisters

I bought this on DVD for less than a quid, and even though It wasn’t that funny, these two lines certainly were:

‘They can’t fucking roll in here like Jehovah’s Witesses!’

‘Take you dick out of the paint!’
‘Nooo, I’m gonna draw something!’

4/10

The Rachels

Lifetime keeps redoing the same story over and over and they will never make it right.

3/10

Breaking In

Panic Room wannabe.

6/10

 

Film Reviews: I, Tonya. Game Night. West Side Story. A Mother’s Rage. The Wool Cap. She’s Having a Baby. Everybody’s Fine. When Billie Beat Bobby. Kindergarten Cop. Elle. Who Killed JonBenet? Maze Runner: The Death Cure. Imaginary Heroes. Sharknado 4. Sharknado 5

19 Thursday Apr 2018

Posted by in movies

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I, Tonya

This is mostly told from Tonya’s perspective and yet, those who haven’t read her autobiography, would never notice the one shocking detail that was omitted…Tonya’s gang rape.

8/10

Game Night

What a treat, epecially for fans of Friday Night Lights and Dexter, like myself! One of the scenes worth mentioning is the one where Jason Bateman’s character tells his Game Night friends that they need to try the cheese, allwhile Kyle Chandler’s character is being tied up. When they’re heading for the doors, Jason says ‘Drive safe’.

8/10

West Side Story

Sadly, it no longer leaves such a strong impression as it did decades ago. Does anyone remember these songs? Despite not standing the test of time, West Side Story is still a tragically beautiful musical.

8/10

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A Mother’s Rage

This is one of my favorite Lifetime films. Lori Loughlin, who hunts pervy guys here, is phenomenal!

9/10

The Wool Cap

I love that Frank Gallagher. I just don’t understand why the monkey had to die.

9/10

She’s Having a Baby

She’s Having a Baby is the most personal story for John Hughes. For some unknown reason, it’s highly underrated. I get that people go for his teen masterpieces and Home Alone and Uncle Buck and they don’t even bother to look twice at this one, but it truly is lovely. Kevin Bacon is sort of annoying at times, but the film as a whole is funny. Every time I watch an Elizabeth McGovern film, I think of the career she could have had if she never left the US, but on the other hand, Cora was my favorite Downton Abbey character and they could have cast someone who wouldn’t fit the role, so I guess it is what it is.

8/10

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Everybody’s Fine

Kept me extremely depressed, and left me that way. All those kids were ungrateful, and all four of them became artists? Four kids and none of them have regular jobs, and they are all artsy?

7/10

When Billie Beat Bobby

I liked how the film revolved around one match and not Billie’s personal life. I don’t understand why this was remade. Is anyone actually suggesting Emma Stone is a better actress than Holly Hunter, because I just laughed out loud.

6/10

Kindergarten Cop

I was the kid who always talked about death. And though I didn’t go as far as stealing other kids’ lunches, I sure liked food.

6/10

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Elle

You report the rape, not take a shower. Jesus. It’s not the rape that is disturbing here, it’s all the consensual sex…some of it with the rapist. The video game rape and the constantly horny lead character made me angry. I was surprised when it wasn’t one of the intern/employees who raped her.

5/10

Who Killed JonBenet?

The child actress’s narration was wonderful.

5/10

Maze Runner: The Death Cure

‘That’ original character dying made it all worth it. But Thomas’s blood is the cure? That is the most ridiculous thing I’ve heard.

5/10

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Imaginary Heroes

I blame myself and ‘Prayers for Bobby’ for assuming that Sigourney Weaver plus her film offspring’s suicide would make for a good film.

4/10

Sharknado 4: The 4th Awakens

How many kids do they have?! Definitely the worst one of all. Even the 5th one was better.

1/10

Sharknado 5: Global Swarming

Oh no! The Queen is trapped, because the sharks are blocking all the entrances to Buckingham Palace! And Tara Reid can fly in this one? I used to get all excited for shark week and this series made me start hating it.

1.5/10

To see what other films I watched this year, please check out my letterboxd account https://letterboxd.com/joanneholly I’m planning on watching 500 films this year and I’m currently at 200.

Have a great day.