Monthly Archives: November 2016

Gilmore Girls: A Year in the Life: Review

30 Wednesday Nov 2016

Posted by in gilmore girls, Lauren Graham, tv series

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Fantastic, emotional, heartbreaking. Exactly what I expected. ‘A Year in the Life’ follows Lorelai and Rory Gilmore nine years after the original series concluded. Within the first seconds, we breathe a sigh of relief as we see that Stars Hollow, the loveliest, most magical little town ever pictured on screen, has not changed a bit. The show itself has the exact amount of wit and charm as the original. The highly anticipated ‘last four words’ left me in pieces. And to think that that’s how the original Gilmore Girls would have ended. Back in 2007, I was afraid this would happen as nothing seemed more fitting. I was relieved when the new writers chose a different direction. The ending is not as shocking today, as Rory is all grown up now. That doesn’t stop me from being a complete mess. What’s worse after the revival finished, I was relieved because somehow I thought the cliffhanger can only mean season two. Only the next day, I realized that was Amy Sherman-Palladino’s way of saying goodbye. Don’t get me wrong, I loved the revival, but the last four words…man. They could have written ‘it’ in somewhere in the middle and at least we would see Lorelai’s proper reaction, Rory’s decision, Emily’s reaction!, the town’s reaction! It would have been heavenly. I really hope for another four episodes next year. I may write a separate review on the revival, but as a whole, I loved it! Everyone stepped in their old shoes so smoothly, especially Lauren Graham. So many memorable scenes, my favorite include Lorelai apologizing to Emily for her drunk behavior and Emily telling her she’s always hated their family; Luke begging Lorelai not to leave him; Lorelai finally remembering an anecdote about her father and so many more. Lorelai making a fool of herself like she did many times in the original series, made me feel right at home. I was really sad about Sookie changing her plans and not wanting to stay at the Dragonfly. I was highly disappointed with most of Rory’s storyline, but at least it was realistic. It was nice to see some familiar Parenthood and Bunheads faces. Please let there be a second season.

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Greys 13.07. Greys 13.08. Greys 13.09. American Horror Story 6.09. The Simpsons 28.06. The Simpsons 28.07. Divorce 1.05. Divorce 1.06

19 Saturday Nov 2016

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Most of our shows are now on a hiatus (thank God for Shameless and The Middle). I was shocked to hear SVU is on a hiatus without any prior announcement. Same with The Good Place. What will you be watching during the break? I will watch Gilmore Girls next Friday, then Fuller House on the 8th of December! I will also watch the rest of the new Transparent, the last few episodes of the last season of Bones and catch up on Jane the Virgin. I also plan to rewatch the first 3 seasons of American Horror Story, possibly seeing the 5th one, still uncertain if I should. Next week I’ll post a massive post on the shocking HTGAWM finale and much more!

Shows now on hiatus: Greys, SVU, How to Get Away With Murder, The Good Place, AHS (done until September 2017)

Shows with new episode for the next two weeks: Shameless, The Middle, Younger, The Simpsons, Scream Queens, Divorce

Greys 13.07

I don’t like the new character played by Justin’s girlfriend on Brothers and Sisters and Scott Foley’s wife. I’m not happy about her taking Webber’s job and eventually hooking up with Arizona. The highlight of this shitty episode was when the new character misspells Amelia’s name as Amelio Shepherd.

A teacher beat up a student.
We’ll see how fascinating she is when she starts handing out pink slips.
So direct her to the door.
Who the heck is Amelio Shepherd?!
That name with that face? It’s not one I’d forget about.

6/10

Greys 13.08

The way Ellen Pompeo said Zola’s name that one time, after the girl told her to go and fix daddy, as she fixes everybody. Absolutely breathtaking. The perfect definition of daydreaming was used as Meredith explained how we make someone up to get through the day in the closing narration. As some who daydreams 18/24 hours a day, let me tell you, it was fulfilling.  I could identify with this episode in a little different way as I have suffered from insomnia since I was 14, and working on used batteries is something I’m very familiar with, especially after working nights for 2.5 years. Richard treats the surgery as a teaching moment as he asks the doctors to imagine it’s someone they love laying on their table. They do something similar, Owen speaks to his missing sister, who tells him he should have married Meredith; Stephanie sees her younger version of herself; Meredith sees her children waiting for her to tell them Derek’s dead and Richard talks about the mother he lost to pancreatic cancer when he was ten. We finally learned something new about him, up to this point all we new was Adele/Ellis/Maggie concerned and now we’re finally getting to know his childhood a little bit. I loved the theatrical, single scene episode and no surprises there, Meredith’s story was my favorite. We watched her tell Zola and Bailey about Derek’s death and we got to see Derek, well a 2006 version of him, thanks to an old footage of him back in season 2. I loved it when Owen’s sister was walking around Meredith in the OR and there was this orange light following her, whereas everyone else was still. We learned why Stephanie became a surgeon and it was a beautiful episode. I loved it when the little girl raised her voice and said ‘Speak up’ in a way that Olivia often does on Shonda’s other show Scandal. Hmm, when to think of it, Mellie too! Powerful women on that show. I could write essays on this episode alone, here are all the best quotes.

We need sleep. Without it we make poor decisions, say things we shouldn’t and sometimes imagine something that’s not there.
How do you know when you’re too tired to operate?
When you make the first mistake.
I have a question, does Gale have a dog?
Maybe she’s whatever Dr Webber says she is.
And I outrank you!
You’re not going to choke this one too, right?
Shut up, for God’s sakes!
We spent months reading about it, remember?
Speak up!
When you’ve been stuck in a bed through most of your childhood…
Children? Are there children?
They’re waiting with her downstairs in the lobby.
Grey, what is your problem!?
What do you think I’m doing right now? Massaging this heart for exercise?
Is he hurt?
Then you should go in there and fix him! You fix everybody!
Zola… I can’t fix him, because no one can fix him. Because, he’s dead. Daddy died.
You didn’t make Gale up.
It’s okay son, there was nothing you could have done, you were only 10 years old.
We can do a partial liver transplant.
Nice save, Grey.
Sometimes you play games in your head. You make up someone, someone good. Whatever you need to keep you going.

10/10

Greys 13.09

Bailey told DeLuca to use the Karev method of identifying patients using the Polaroid camera, which broke me. Remember the ferry boat accident back in season three? What a ride that was. Four of the songs from season one and two were reused and everything felt warm and homey and I felt like a teenager again. I really hope Alex doesn’t leave. I know he wasn’t getting good storylines, but he is one of the MAGIC five. When Meredith mentioned the original five and how she can’t be the only one by herself, naturally I burst into tears. I really enjoyed all the Alex/Jo interactions and him telling her she is Jo Wilson and should stay. Leah made Ben impersonate a priest and it was fun to watch him explain himself in front of his wife when she knew nothing about it. Overall, it was a fantastic episode, and I’m only annoyed by the main character they’re trying to push down our and Arizona’s throats. I would rather have her be with Leah than with this Brothers and Sisters alum.

Zero years is the goal.
The only way they can identify who made it to this hospital and who didn’t is this photo. I want a photo of every patient on this board in the next hour.
One minute you’re fine and the next thing, everything just collapses around you.
That has to be illegal.
The foundation was crippling.
You’re not trash. Don’t let anyone say that. You’re not trash, Jo.
I’m married. I’m married to a guy who almost beat me to death.
Jo Wilson isn’t my real name. That’s why I couldn’t marry you.
If I disappear after tomorrow, I don’t want you to think it’s you, ever.
This is your life. You’re Jo Wilson, you belong here.
Jo’s married.
What are you even saying right now?
That’s how I taught you to fire people. I’m ornamental and you know it.
You’ll be okay. You’ll be fine. You’ll be fine.
Me? Of course, I’ll be fine. I’m always fine, don’t you know that?
Who you are will be gone.
I’d hug you goodbye, but you’d have to scrub again. Goodbye, Mer.
You know I’d go down the river for you. Whatever you’re doing this for, please don’t.

10/10

American Horror Story 6.09

Taissa Farmiga is back! (and gets killed off in the same episode). I thought there was enough of the ‘found footage’ this season, which seems like a longer and a lot worse good old Blair Witch. This should have been the season finale.

Oh my God, is that the same girl!?
That’s the thing, there was no body.
This is exactly how every horror movie works!
Can you say that again?
I killed Daddy.
This is such  good idea. God, I can’t wait to get to the house!
Let me just say, that I’m a huge fan.
Oh no, I love Shelby!
Present yourself for slaughter.
They killed two kids.
Jesus, there’s another one.
You fucking murderer.

8/10

The Simspons 28.06

What a fine Friday Night Lights like episode. Adored all the music and the little FNL things, but it didn’t seem like enough. Why would it, it wasn’t a tribute, just one long reference. I enjoy the kid centred episodes the most.

We’re late to prenatal yoga.
Milhouse is 10 why are we still doing that?

7.5/10

The Simpsons 28.07

The Simpsons head to Cuba and the highlight being Homer buying postcards and saying that saves him a trip to the beach. Started off good, turn to nonsense.

I love seeing people I know, fail.
A lot of things are America’s shame.
I’m sorry there’s a fee if you don’t cancel withing 24 years.
That saves us from going to the beach.

4.5/10

Divorce 1.05

Okay, at least, Dean Winters joined the cast! Other than that, this show is so bad and boring, I’m only watching it because it will only have one season (let’s hope). Why the heck was she telling the lawyer about her never faking an orgasm with her husband we’ll never know.

Savable? She fucked a French guy 69 times!
I wanted you to help me move them, not put my dead husband’s flowers on your fucking coffee table!
This is not a teaching hospital! This is my life!
He couldn’t pick that dog out in a fucking line up.

3/10

Divorce 1.06

He took the fault on himself, so her parents wouldn’t know she was the one cheating, okay that was actually good. The husband saying ‘Pleased to meet you’ instead of ‘Peace be with you’ at the church was another lovely surprise from this below average show.

Pleased to meet you!
I don’t like touching people.
I cheated on her.

2/10

Shameless 7.05. How To Get Away with Murder 3.07. How To Get Away with Murder 3.08. American Horror Story 6.08. The Good Place 1.09. Divorce 1.01. Divorce 1.02. Divorce 1.03. Divorce 1.04

13 Sunday Nov 2016

Posted by in american horror story, divorce, how to get away with murder, shameless, the good place, tv series, veronica mars

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Today I realized the true reason why I’ve been so depressed this past year. And that is, I haven’t done anything creative the whole year long. I used to be that type of person who wrote screenplays on a weekly basis, and drew and painted in the meantime. This past year I became more and more of a ‘watcher’. Even though I haven’t necessarily watched more than I usually do. It didn’t bother me that people got their internships, went on to pursue Mas, it didn’t bother me at all. Because I never wanted them in the first place. And then I heard about this person I know getting a publishing internship in NY. Jealousy did not wait long. Publishing is not a path I want to take, but I realized, that even though I cannot psychically pursue my dreams at this moment, I still need to build a writing portfolio I’d be proud of. That, of course, won’t stop me from writing on here and reviewing everything. Okay, onto the post.

Shameless 7.05

Frank receives a surprising donation, whereas the Gallaghers face a broken washing machine (yes, the one Jimmy gave them). Carl is actually going through with his military school application, which reminded me of the good old days when Ian wanted to join the army. Fiona plans to buy a washing joint. Debbie asks Frank for help in getting quick money and ends up fighting with a homeless woman over a corner. Child protective services are not happy with that. Debbie meets a disabled 23 year old with money and a house. Overall, a really good episode.

I have a military school interview. I can’t go in there smelling like one of Frank’s homeless.
Spelling deficiency is good for the cause.
I’m gonna be stuck in this hood forever.
Even the homeless get better stuff than us.

10/10

How To Get Away with Murder 3.07

A mother poisons herself with antifreeze, to teach her kids respect. Annalise lets the main 5 tell her what they really think of her.

This is a woman who read my diary to employees at the stuff meeting.
I just think better when I drink.
You need to drop her and represent us!
That was a lie. Eve moved to San Francisco, I haven’t spoken to her in weeks.
Mean, alcoholic…
A few more weeks of not drinking and they can add fat-ass to their list.
A policy that allowed you to read your daughter’s emails.

5.5/10

How To Get Away With Murder 3.08

Wes lies on the stand and Annalise tells Frank to shoot himself.

Look me in the eye and say it’s not you.
I’ll find out who it is.
Tell that bastard that if he ever comes near this house, I’ll shoot him.
Annalise needs your help.
You will probably go on a killing spree and bang on top of a corpse.
She’s the one who gave Frank the money. She took your son from you, Annalise.
Something bad is always about to happen in this house.
If I pick up the phone, she’s gonna ask me for money or to give legal advice to some methy cousin I never even knew I had.
No more blood. Promise me, Frank.
Go back inside, you were right, this is what she needs.
You let your husband beat it out of you.
Is that what your husband did?
Lots of men.
I never got better! You watched me suffer all those years! You watched me think that I killed my boy. You killed my son.
What’s taking you so long? Think I’m gonna feel guilty? Cause I won’t.
Frank, don’t!
Get out!

10/10

American Horror Story 6.08

I just realized this season only has 10 episodes. What a shame. Yes, it is a disastrous season and they seem to be replaying the same scenes over and over, but AHS is exciting and it rarely ever has weaker episodes. How about this episode, huh? Tell me Sarah Paulson thanking her fans and apologizing for dying, as she had so many wonderful performances left for her fans wasn’t the best thing you’ve seen this entire season.

I’m not getting killed off of some damn TV Show.
She flipped out when she saw Matt having sex with that thing.
Conveniently for you, we can’t ask them.
I had so many wonderful performances for you. I promise you. I will love you always.

3.5/10

The Good Place 1.09

For some reason this episode made me want to rewatch Veronica Mars. Four episodes down, three seasons to go.

The nice boring one is yours, the trash bag is ours.
I truly believe that the good place is where you belong.
I don’t belong here, but I want to.
We’re not letting Fake Eleonor go.

4/10

Divorce 1.01

A show I’m still not fully sure of, but I do like the husband, so I may just keep watching. I absolutely adored the Sandra Bullock reference!

Obviously trying to shoot him, didn’t help.
You’re Jessie James and I’m Sandra Bullock. I get to rise from the ashes and win a fucking Academy Award!

4.5/10

Divorce 1.02

Seems hypocritical to ask for a divorce, when you’re the one cheating. The husband found out about wife’s affair. The show seems funny so far.

I’m not completely convinced it’s the same dog, but let’s move on.

4/10

Divorce 1.03

Best episode yet! Especially liked the part when the husband went to a house viewing and pretended to be a buyer and when he couldn’t get over the shock of how many times his wife slept with this Kiwi guy (and he’s still convinced he’s French). He also lied about helping 9/11 responders, because he thought the shops would be the next target.

Whoever did this place did a fucking good job! Are you gonna make and offer? Are you a real estate agent? I’d like to make an offer!
32.
What the fuck!?
What was the number you had in your head?
Two.
Doesn’t it sound like they did a shitload of fucking? It sounds like they did a shitload of fucking to me.
Making the fuck with French pendacho.
He had an emotional affair with her.
It wasn’t an affair. We didn’t fuck!
You had rushed down to ground zero to deliver water to first responders.
Oh fuck it, I didn’t take any water to anybody.

8/10

Divorce 1.04

Robert wants to make a indoors playground for kids and call it a happy place, which sounds like a great place for pedophiles to pick their victims.

Bonjour, fuck face.
It’d be a real pedophile magnet. It’s exactly where I would hang out if I was turned on by kids.

3/10

The Middle 8.04. Shameless 7.04. How to Get Away with Murder 3.06. The Goldbergs 4.06

12 Saturday Nov 2016

Posted by in how to get away with murder, shameless, the goldbergs, the middle, tv series

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Quick, tiny post, in between flu medicine. I’ve decided not to continue watching Secrets and Lies, I only watched the opening episode of this season. I really started having mixed feelings for The Good Place after the main character was supposed to get sent back as the ‘hell people’ were extremely annoying. I’m still not sure about Divorce either. Come back tomorrow for a detailed post on that one-scene theatrical Greys, that quite shocking new AHS and many others.

The Middle 8.04

Frankie buys underwear that reads ‘I’d hit that’ after which she admits she’s been an inactive member of a local gym for 22 years. Oh man, I get that. While everyone is snapchatting from their gyms, I sit at home and try to cool off after an annoying second job I just took. I had to cut my hours in my old one, and that part time job feels like a full time, because it’s physically wrenching and I haven’t had the energy to go to the gym since September. Sure, I also moved much further away, and paying 10.99 just didn’t seem like a good idea. Back to the show, Frankie falls on the treadmill and everyone sees her ‘I’d hit that’ underwear. Troy gets on the football team, because he’s big. I don’t know how is it legal for Sue and Lexie to get that dorm room. It has to be a Health and Safety violation and the girls should have sued the school. I know most college rooms are shitty, but not that shitty. Speaking of Sue, a pizza delivery guy pronounces her names as ‘Hack’ instead of Heck. Meanwhile, Brick realizes how hard it is to pretend to be a social guy and actually have a high school experience. Let me tell you, I was exactly like Brick when I was in junior high and high school, sure I had better social skills than Brick, but It all seemed like a ton of work. No one was as into TV shows and good films as I was and to be honest, I do have two friends from those years and all the new people interested in TV and cinema I’ve met didn’t exactly ‘stay’ in my life, if you know what I mean. Even though film was my major, all the friendships ended after university. I guess it’s true what they say, we do meet our best friends in high school. And that though is scary. I guess the lesson here is try to be sociable, I know it seems like a waste of time and you don’t want to inhale all that smoke fumes, but maybe all those sociable folks are onto something. And you are definitely left out.

Woah, what a pit.
Who me?
What’s your name?
Brick Heck.
Again, not you.
I’d hit that.
If you need reading glasses to see the underwear you should probably just go straight to diapers.
Fine, right down the sport words, I’ll try to ask.
You should come.
Should I have my parents call his parents?
I don’t think high school works that way.
I’ve been an inactive member of a ladies gym going 22 years now.
I’ll have as much cereal as I want.
I have a pizza for Sue Hack.
Start packing, cause we are leaving this dump.
You hold your own pee bottle.
It was just exhausting. All I could thing about was how ling till I could leave.
Did you make your list of five favorite fonts?

10/10

Shameless 7.04

Anyone else not really digging Frank’s new family? And the whole homeless shelter storyline? Definitely the weakest episode of the season.

They’ll be good earners someday.
Those scumbags fucked with the wrong emperor.
We’ll do our drugs and beat each other up in doors.
In my country, you insult someone’s father, you get sent on a ranch to fuck a horse.
Why am I the only one in the family, you haven’t offered the job to?

6.5/10

How to Get Away with Murder 3.06

Gosh, this season am I right? So bad it hurts. Why can’t all the episodes be about Frank beating up Bonnie’s dad or Annalise and Eve? Going home in an hour to watch yesterday’s episode, but I wasn’t very interested in it yesterday.We learn Asher is alive, so at this point the dead man could either be Wes, Connor or Frank, or maybe Nate, but doubt it. Annalise is eating chips in the bathroom.

You take another step and I’ll chain you in the basement like Rebecca.
You’ve no idea what goes on in this house.
You spread your legs for him too?
You’re ready to fail, like your dad’s condom.
Well, court is unpredictable. Sit down.
I took you off the waitlist, I should have left you alone.
I wanted to be a better person.

9.5/10

The Goldbergs 4.06

One of the best episodes I’ve seen this fall.

His acting gets slightly better in every movie.
Arnold says 6 lines in this movie and your dad talked over every one.
He’s not from Austria like Arnold or Belgium like a Van Damme or wherever Segal is from.
He’s clearly having some sort of an episode, get everything you can.
Just take my 80 bucks.
Dear Lord, this is a big budget movie! I’m making a big budget movie!
Mommy remember that one time I lived in your tummy?
I just had to capture the moment, so I can remember it forever.
It’s just a store.
Not to me, I’ve had my best memories there. Just think of all the coupons I’ve doubled there, all the managers I’ve made cry, all the clothes I’ve worn for a decade and then returned no questions asked.
It looks cheap as hell. It’s all dark and hard to see. The camera shakes like crazy. Also, it sounds like crap. Like a washed out crammy public access show that’s on at midnight.
Here’s the stuff, make it good.
All this time I’ve had access to high-tech Hollywood film equipment and you’ve never told me.
Surprise, anger, surprise, anger, and most important. Love scene.
Please don’t show us love scene.
What’s the one thing you love the most about going shopping with me?
Nodding yes or no as you try on outfits, like they do in movies.
Oh fuck no, what kind of a store doesn’t have tuna. I will find tuna. give me fucking tuna.
And the Oscar for best actor goes to Barry Norman Goldberg.
Lots of other actors would say thank you, I’m saying, you’re welcome.
This film will be my calling card and it will make Jamie Lee Curtis notice me.
My sweaters, my glorious sweaters!
This is my mum’s, all of these are!
And if Gambles wasn’t going out of business before, they sure would have after my mom and sister were done there.

10/10

SVU 18.05. The Middle 8.03. American Horror Story 6.07. The Simpsons 28.04. The Simpsons 28.05. The Good Place 1.08.

06 Sunday Nov 2016

Posted by in american horror story, special victims unit, the good place, the simpsons, tv series

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SVU 18.05

Mariska had a ER reunion with her ER boyfriend, who as it turns out is also her first police parter on SVU. Now he’s trying to guilt Olivia into letting his son’s rape slide.It was a pretty good episode.

She was drunk, but she seemed fine.
Fine? What does that mean?
He was my first partner. He looked out for me. He taught me a lot.
His first mistake was humping a passed out girl.
You remember having sex?
He dated your cousin?
Aggressive in what way?
Sexually.
Your son raped an unconscious girl.
He lied to save your ass. You don’t own him anything.
What happened to you was a violation and it should never have happened.
For God’s sake, we are doing you a favor.
No matter what I say, or didn’t say, that means he raped me.
That means he raped you? Or is that what the SVU detectives and the DA told you?
I never would have consented to a guy I just met on the ground by the garbage. I was passed out and he did what he wanted anyway.
And you wnat to destroy his life, because he had sex with some drunk girl?
I knew you were passed out. I couldn’t stop myself

10/10

The Middle 8.03

Axl’s new girlfriend ran into the sliding door twice, and she’s still introducing herself to people. Brick went dressed as a bowling cone for Halloween. Brick finally got a chair same as everybody.

Hi, I’m April!
The end of fall right before autumn starts.
Now he’s all ‘dogs can’t eat chocolate’.
Brad Pitt was married to Jennifer Aniston!?
Either of us would have an affair. Cause we’re too tired.
May. It sounds like Mary.
I told Axl he should be nicer to you.
My own chair!
Welcome to the family!

8.5/10

American Horror Story 6.07

Is anyone else not really getting this season? It’s not artsy, scary or well acted, so what’s the point of it?

I’ve done my share of slasher films t. This does not smell like corn syrup.
They only got me for 3 episodes, but I got 5! They said fans wanted more. They wanted the butcher!
Judgemental motherfucker.
You think I’m going outside, getting lost in those woods?
I know this goes against every fiber of your being, but culd you please avoid bloodshed!
How may times do I have to tell you that this is real.
I’m not American, I’m not used to all that garbage.
I’m sorry, I just wanted to be on TV!

9.5/10

The Simpsons 28.04

The Hunger Games and Friend Request references! Homer played Haymitch. Everyone thought Lisa was murdering people, so they gave her a graveyard wing for all her victims.

Property of Ned Homer.
Why did my best friend had to die? It’s a great college essay, but it’s not worth it.
We now bury Sherry and Terry, survived by brothers Jerry and Larry, and her father Barry and mother Mary.
Lisa Simpson’s Wing.
Hello, best friend!
I’ll have friends in college.

7/10

The Simpsons 28.05

Mousetrapping a murderer.
I lost it to someone who doesn’t speak English.
I’m always happy to temporarily lose weight.
Sorry no ethnic food in the microwave.
And woman too, cause you have to say that too.
That kid wasn’t going anywhere anyway.
Hollywood’s greatest honor, shared credit, no money.

8/10

The Good Place 1.08

The show is certainly getting bad.

You lied so much you forgot your birthday?
Or post on social media that you were emotionally invested in any of the relationships the contestants were pursuing?

3.5/10

Shameless 7.02. Shameless 7.03. The Goldbergs 4.05. American Horror Story 6.06. Younger 3.04. Younger 3.05. Scream Queens 2.04. The Good Place 1.06. The Good Place 1.07

05 Saturday Nov 2016

Posted by in american horror story, friends, scream queens, shameless, the goldbergs, the good place, tv series, younger

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I just realized that most of the shows will go on their Christmas hiatus in two or three weeks, so I better catch up with my reviews. Posting a few today and then I’m off to watch new Greys. Expect a massive post tomorrow.

Shameless 7.02

Shameless was just added on Netflix UK! In the newest episode Frank disinherits the whole family and all of the kids are actually relieved. Also, Frank washing himself up in the toilet.

I’m filling out the paperwork to disinherit you, abortion should have beens.
I’m chaning her name to Harriet. Harry.
That’s a perfect name for the diesel dyke she’s going to grow up to some day.
Tough titties.
I’m the only woman of color and I’ll sue your ass.
Excuse me, I saw your help wanted sign?
Hey Olga, you’re fired.
Don’t be corrupting my son with your interracial bisexual funny business.
That’s okay. You don’t have to go to college.

10/10

Shameless 7.03

Frank found himself a new family. Debbie continues to steal. Fiona has an amazing monologue on how she still can make something of herself after she inspired by a millionaire high school dropout.

Welcome, new Gallaghers.
He sold her into sex slavery.
I got some money. I took it from teacher’s purse.
That’s the new Fiona.
You’d call the cops?! What kind of a Gallagher are you?
She’s retarded.
Who gave you the right to occupy these premises?
Statue of Liberty when she said come the homeless and Jesus Christ when he washed the feet of the homeless and gave them wine.
Are those Greek letters on this motherfucking house?
I am just as likely as anyone else in this family to make something of myself and it’s about time you got that you arrogant shit.

9/10

The Goldbergs 4.05

Beverly summing up exactly what the show is about had me in tears! Unfortunately, the episode itself wasn’t too good.

You spread the rumor of me dating the lunch lady!
I’m his muse?
Actually, Stephen King is his muse.
You were there for me. If that’s being a Barry, I’m okay with it.
You keep writing about me, about this family. It may not all be true, but it’s pretty damn good.
Turns out the best stories are the one that come from home.

3/10

American Horror Story 6.06

I am never more excited than when it comes to murder. What a bloody episode. Best this season, and unfortunately the last good one as well. I absolutely loved the ‘Blair Witch’ warning in the middle. What did you guys think of Sarah’s British accent? I thought she’s doing a great job, especially compering to Evan’s really bad one a few episodes ago. I loved that Kathy Bates’s character went full on ‘Mysery’ and killed some. Also, OJ Simpson and Martha being friends in this episode made me so damn happy. I know every teenager everywhere plus one of my good friends are mourning Evan’s character, but he played just really shitty this season and his character was unnecessary in the first place.

If they look out the window and see trailers parked in the fucking yard.
You became obsessed.
You’re not on the show. You’re never gonna be on the show again.
We only want real people this year.
I’m a real person.
You’re unstable.
Do you think the restraining order will keep her away?
God, I hope not.
I have no interest in finding out who that is.
Was that Agnes?
She’s here to steal my Saturn!
Your car?
No, my Saturn award!
Over the next three days during the Blood Moon, every participant in this series died under mysterious circumstances. Except for one.
The show planned by the producers never aired . This is the assembled found footage.
Hi, girl.
Hi, Dominic. When did you get here?
Fuck you, Sidney.

10/10

Younger 3.04

I know Younger is from the Sex and the City creator, but it annoys me how sex centered the show is getting. This shitty episode fo example was all about period sex.

I’m recommending we cut stuff by 45 % next quarter. Not you. Just the old people, like Diana.

1/10

Younger 3.05

New lingo, what not to say anymore. At least we got rid of the stupid millionaire kid. And email will never go out of style. It’s just too good. And we all know Snapchat etc. will die just like Vine and so many others are.

I think there is a way to view private. I think it’s called stalk-book. I’ll check it out.Oh you can put my finger on it.
No, I don’t have Google alerts, maybe my assistant should set it up.

3/10

Scream Queens 2.04

Loved the SVU reference, but other than that it was a really bad episode. At least all the annoying characters are getting killed off.

Where I come from sad and skinny 20 something’s feelings are more important than some stupid documents!
These are their stories.
You stupid hobo.
That’s because you insist of Snapchatting during sex.

3.5/10

The Good Place 1.06

All the Friends references!

Sicko, freako, creepo, George Washington.
Is it that movie where Laura Linney cries in a lake house, because Jude Law left her for his ex wife’s ghost?
Like if your uber driver talks to you, the ride should be free?
I even watched all 10 seasons of the show called Friends. How did they afford that apartment? A waitress and a chef with those Manhattan real estate prices?
Since we’re becoming friends like Ross and Phoebe.
We’re combo but okay.
Unlike Ross when he promised Emily not to talk to Rachel.
I feel like Friends in season 8, out of ideas and forcing Joey and Rachel together even though it made no sense.

4.5/10

The Good Place 1.07

Only the very ending made sense.

Michael, the problem in the neighborhood is me. I was brought to The Good Place by mistake.

0.5/10