Author Archives: Joanne

SVU 18.08. The Middle 8.11. The Goldbergs 4.12. Nashville 5.02. The Good Place 1.10. The Good Place 1.11

22 Sunday Jan 2017

Posted by in Mariska Hargitay, modern family, nashville, special victims unit, the goldbergs, the good place, the middle, tv series

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I’ve started Modern Family, because of Married with Children withdrawals. I’m finishing season one and the show is only half as good as the Bundys and most of the comedies I watch. The Middle, for example is pure gold. I’m enjoying Sofia Vergara’s character, I also like Ed O’Neil’s character (duh Al Bundy),  Cameron and Manny.

SVU 18.08

A lesbian mom hits on Olivia making her uncomfortable and a child of two mothers is kidnapped. Olivia breaks up with Tucker.

Who loads a truck at 4am in the morning?
Actually, in New York, it’s not that uncommon.
You must be used to talking to people on worst nights of their lives.
No wedding ring, are you in a relationship Lieutenant?
Actually, I am.
I’m sorry.
That’s okay. I’m seeing someone.
A few months ago you told me you were happy, but you were crying.
I remember.
And you were right, we were never gonna last.
Take care of yourself, Olivia Benson.

7/10

The Middle 8.11

Frankie wins a maid! Almost none of them are any good and she keeps exchanging them, one of them kept saying that the bathtub, for example is non-fixable. Each time she came up to Frankie and said ‘Mrs, I need to show you something.’ and Frankie kept telling her to leave those for her to wash later. Axl moves into temporary housing with Sue, but they all get kicked out and Lexie finally caves in and lets her dad rent an apartment for her and Sue.

We won free maid service!
We’ve had the college experience, and the orphanage experience and the prison experience!
It was my real life Downton Abbey dream come true.
She clearly made some bad life choices.
Worse than us?
My favorite sister!
I’m your driver.
He’s cool, got 4 stars.
Mrs, I need to show you something.
Food is old, everything is rotten.
Mrs…
I know, I know, just show me.
If I give up, this is who I am. But as long as I’m trying, there’s still hope.
Brick is 3 years away from graduating from high school. Sue is always at home and Axl is about to graduate, so you know he’ll be moving back in.
I mean, I have a daughter, but Coleen is better.
You can’t win twice.
That’s truer than you know.
Home is where the crap is.

8/10

The Goldbergs 4.12

School is closed as it has snowed in and the Goldberg kids are stuck at home. While Adam and Barry build and igloo and fight with Murray over the thermostat, Erica is about to send in her college application. She wrote and essay about her personal hero, and Bev gets a little intrusive when she finds out she’s the hero. Sending application by post and listening to the radio announcements as to which schools are closed made me feel nostalgic. This show is a ray of sunshine, brings hope and just makes the future seem promising.

Am I still asleep or did he say closed?
Meanwhile, mom cleaned Erica’s room, like an FBI agent.
87, temperature of the rich.
Every day you roll your eyes at me and you tell me I’ve ruined your life and I know that’s how it goes, but it hurts.

3/10

Nashville 5.02

Season 5 started off so well, unfortunately, the next three episodes did not meet the criteria. Rayna asks Deacon to write their story.

I want us to write our story. Together.
Like a book?
No, a record, like a concept album.
If I don’t take this risk, I’m not gonna be an artist anymore.
Some of the best music comes out of some darkest places.
You’re the one that’s always telling me that pain is the gift.
You’re right, the pain and passion, it’s worth it.

3.5/10

The Good Place 1.10

The show wasn’t that good, but watch it because you’ll enjoy season finale!

I’m ranking my favorite fast and furious movies. You said you wanted to know who I am and this is the best way to get to know me.
Are you making a move on me?
Maybe you, if he doesn’t pick me, I’m gonna start throwing stuff.
I take it the moron is me.

3.5/10

The Good Place 1.11

We learn how Jason died.

I’m sorry, crazy high Eleanor was my nickname in college.
Walmart. A place regular people go, you haven’t heard of it.
Well, fork you too.
That’s cute, I love you too, little egg.
One of the giraffes tried to hump him.
No, not cool, he stopped learning at the age 7.
Yeah dog, ‘I love butts’
Oh that was another serious crime I comitted, I should have mentioned that earlier.
Is it just me or am I acing this test!
He suffocated to death in there.

6/10

Goodnight Mommy. Middle School: The Worst Years of My Life. Fender Bender. Trolls. National Lampoon’s Vacation. Inside Out. Layover. A Christmas Horror Story. The Disappointments Room. Barricade. Scathing.

16 Monday Jan 2017

Posted by in Lauren Graham, movies

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goodnight-mommymiddleschool fenderr

Goodnight Mommy

This and The Babadook are nothing as they seem. Both advertised as horror, but in fact, psychological. Beautiful scenery, eerie and mind-blowing at times. Pay attention before the opening title and you’ll have an easy understanding of the film. Ideal for fans of psychological thrillers, horrors or foreign cinema.

7/10

Middle School: The Worst Years of My Life

‘The Worst Years of My Life’ is a film about an artsy and rebellious teenager Rafe based on the Middle School book series by James Patterson. Yes, the same Patterson who wrote the Alex Cross series, including the phenomenal Kiss the Girls and Along Came a Spider! ‘Movie School’ is shockingly deep and insightful for a family film, I was nicely surprised by the ‘brother’ twist. I’m glad little Mason from Private Practice is doing well and it’s always a pleasure to see Lauren Graham. I have never read the Middle School series, but it seems to be the boy version of Jim Benton’s Dear Dumb Diary series, which I loved growing up. After you finish watching Middle School, go grab Dear Dumb Diary.

6/10

Fender Bender

A middle-aged guy purposely bumps into a teenager’s car. The girl (Makenzie Vega known for The Good Wife and The Assault) takes pictures of the damages and the guy. Her disappointed parents forbid her from going on a trip with them and leave her alone for the night. Despite the main character being an absolute moron, the storyline kept me engaged. Fender Bender takes a slightly different direction than the usual ‘forced road accident’ based horrors, as the attacker follows the character home. Why would she not be panicking about the assailant taking pictures of her in the shower and stupidly dive into a present he left for her, no one knows. It could have been such a good flick. I have described this title to my horror obsessed friends, and I recommend this title to all slasher fans.

6.5/10

trolls vacation inside-out

Trolls

Clearly aimed at an audience of 3-year-olds, who don’t need a plot to follow, just a couple of shiny, colorful, sparkly things to look at. It wasn’t clear why they remade so many classic songs instead of writing an entirely new soundtrack. Shockingly the cinema was packed when it came out, there were around 150 kids under 12 waiting with their parents in and outside the cinema, I bet 90 percent of them came out disappointed. If you’re looking for a recent animated feature worth checking out, go with Zootopia, or The Secret Life of Pets.

3/10

National Lampoon’s Vacation

‘Christmas Vacation’ was ten times better. At least this one had John Candy in it, for a couple of rollercoaster rides, but still. Uncertain how to feel about the angry dog being killed and later grandma dying, but the film as a whole was not that funny.

3/10

Inside Out

Some of the animation, particularly Joy’s character, was so bright, it was impossible to look at the screen. The film is clearly aimed at very young audience, pre-school or early school years at most. The film earned an Academy Award for best animation, which gives me hope for Zootopia, which was twice this good and the animation was ten times better.

5/10

layove  a-christmas-horror

Layover

What the hell with this poster?! This was not in the film. The movie would have been so much better if it was. For a Lifetime film, Layover wasn’t a complete disaster, even though I couldn’t stand the annoying model wannabes. Consider watching another Lauren Holly film where the film also takes place on a plane, Turbulence, instead. Was that a ride.

4/10

A Christmas Horror Story

Nicely surprised, as it was so much better than the very average 2015 Christmas horror sensation ‘Krampus’ and the ending was just perfect.

3/10

 

dissapointments-room barricade scathing

The Disappointment Room

No greater disappointment than this film. How could Wentworth Miller write the genius psychological thriller The Stoker and then such a crappy horror?

1/10

Barricade

So it wasn’t a horror? What a waste of time. And it started off pretty good, the ending though, disastrous.

1/10

Scathing

I always have faith in low-budget indie horror films, and I have myself to blame for that, but once a while those are the films that surprise us. Scathing was not that film. It was just awful. I watched this Irish horror ‘In Fear’ the same day, equally low budget and independent, very similar, yet much better. Try In Fear instead.

0.5/10

SVU 18.07. The Middle 8.10. Nashville 5.01. The Goldbergs 4.11. Scream Queens 2.10

06 Friday Jan 2017

Posted by in Mariska Hargitay, nashville, scream queens, special victims unit, the goldbergs, the middle, tv series

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SVU 18.07

Olivia saves Carissi’s life and Tucker tells Olivia he plans to retire. SVU’s social media account sure gave us a scare with the whole Olivia retiring rumor. Boy was that a fright. For the first time since season 15 we’ve had an episode that wasn’t haunting or a bit exceptional.

It changes you for the worse, not the better.
Who are you and what have you done with Carissi? You really feel that way? The job doesn’t change you, it makes you more of who you really are.
It’s okay. It’s completely normal.
Not in a creepy way.
There’s no other way to stalk someone.
Yeah, this is detective Amanda Rollins NYPD SVU.
This is not your fault.
They’re predators. They look for light, they look fo goodness and try to steal it.
Being a cop didn’t change him. He was always bad.
Hope this does not make you want to retire.
No, the exact opposite.

7/10

The Middle 8.10

The Hecks go to an escape room and they try their best to beat the Donaghue’s high score. I rated it as 3.5, which officially makes it the weakest episode of The Middle.

We’ve finally given up.
We ate pop tarts, because we like to support American businesses.
That’s what’s great about you Hecks, you have fun no matter what!
Dreaming is just showing off while you’re asleep.
We beat the Donoghues!
What do you mean how was my day?! We beat the Donoghues! It was a great day!

3.5/10

Nashville 5.01

Juliette survives the plane crash and Rayna has PTSD after Juliette’s flying experience and decides to take a road trip back home to Nashville. We will probably never see Lyla again, and Rayna has realised that she failed as a producer, but she cannot produce her own music as she doesn’t feel she has anything left to say. It was the most wonderful 43 minutes we could ask for and I’m glad we brought the show back! I just loved how the petrol guy reacted to seeing Rayna. The heart-breaking scene between Rayna and the blind older man asking her if she sings in the shower was just ah, wonderful.

Oh sweet Jesus, there’s bodies, there’s two, three.
Fill it up m’am? Can I get your autograph miss James?
They found the plane 20 miles from here.
This was the plane Juliette Barnes was flying from Los Angeles.
Are you okay, Miss James?
I’m not recording anymore because I don’t have anything to say.
I’ve worked so hard to keep my label afloat, I forgot who I am as an artist.
You know how many times I’ve been stuck and then saved by somebody who at that moment could see stuff I couldn’t see.
How do you know the words.
I listened.
Don’t care for singing?
I sing a little bit.
Yeah, in shower?
You should let yourself sing.
Why’d you say that?

10/10

The Goldbergs 4.11

The episode revolves around pervy boys tormenting a girl about boobs and the Dead Poets Society and it’s incredible! And even though we knew that Barry would become a doctor, it was revealed it in this episode, they still pretend Murray is a furniture salesman, not a doctor, but I guess that was a successful attempt at making the show be more relatable. I almost wrote a shoe salesman, as I’ve been watching Married with Children reruns every day. We haven’t had The Goldbergs in two weeks and I’m already having withdrawals!

This movie proves that a sub is the most important person in a child’s life!
Female reproductive system. And out. Class dismissed.
I used to eat lunch at school bathroom.
In that moment I finally saw how hard it was for Emmy and I knew exactly what to do.
Growing up is an awkward adventure.
I’m your big sis, that’s what I’m here for.
Beverly Goldberg believed in you this whole time.

10/10

Scream Queens 2.10

I know season two sucked and almost no one watched it, but I still sort of want season 3. I will miss seeing Jamie Lee on the small screen. And even though I can’t stand Channel, it was nice to see Emma Roberts on a weekly basis again.

Oh my god, Channels are impossible to kill. It’s like their stupidity and narcissism is a protective shield.
Hester, you should have warned us.
Collateral damage.
Survival is about being skinny, pretty and ruthless.
Rich again.
You be you, America, cause Channel Oberlin is gonna be me.

10/10

30 Best Episodes of Fall 2016

29 Thursday Dec 2016

Posted by in american horror story, fuller house, gilmore girls, greys anatomy, how to get away with murder, special victims unit, this is us, tv series, younger

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Fall 2016 definitely wasn’t TV’s best season, to be honest, it was more of a ‘snoozeville all the way through. I must admit, the season felt incomplete without Scandal, Nashville, The Good Wife, Downton Abbey and Castle, but at least we got Shameless four months early.

  1. Gilmore Girls A Year in the Life: Fall
  2. SVU 18.04
  3. Fuller House 2.12
  4. Shameless 7.11
  5. Greys 13.09
  6. Gilmore Girls A Year in the Life: Summer
  7. Fuller House 2.11
  8. Greys 13.08
  9. The Goldbergs 4.06
  10. The Middle 18.01
  11. This Is Us 1.01
  12. Shameless 7.10
  13. The Middle 8.05
  14. How To Get Away With Murder 3.09
  15. Gilmore Girls A Year in the Life: Spring
  16. Greys 13.05
  17. This Is Us 1.04
  18. American Horror Story 6.06
  19. Gilmore Girls A Year in the Life: Winter
  20. This Is Us 1.02
  21. How To Get Away With Murder 3.05
  22. Younger 3.12
  23. How To Get Away With Murder 3.04
  24. The Middle 8.05
  25. Greys 13.04
  26. How To Get Away With Murder 3.08
  27. Shameless 7.02
  28. The Middle 8.02
  29. Fuller House 2.10
  30. American Horror Story 6.01

4 episodes of The Middle, all 4 episodes of Gilmore Girls, 4 episodes of Greys, 3 episodes of Fuller House, 3 episodes of Shameless, 3 episodes of This is Us, 2 episodes of SVU, 2 episodes of American Horror Story, one episode of The Goldbergs, and one episode of Younger

Shows watched that didn’t make the list: Scream Queens, The Simpsons and The Good Place.

I haven’t had the time to catch up on Transparent, so I may add an episode or two to the list in January.

Shameless 7.11. The Middle 8.07. The Middle 8.09. Shut Eye 1.01. This is Us 1.02. This is Us 1.03. This is Us 1.04. This is Us 1.05

28 Wednesday Dec 2016

Posted by in shameless, shut eye, the middle, this is us, tv series

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Shameless 7.11

Mickey made it to Mexico, but without Ian. Debbie signed up for junior college to study welding. And Monica died.

The naked wedding.
It was beautiful.
Yeah, if you’re a pedophile.
Drinking turns the volume down. Makes the world more tolerable.
Sing fucking Taylor Swift, I don’t care. Get out of the fucking car.
Kev, you misspelled the word resume on your resume.
They help you rip off movies.
I forgive you for promising me to that drug dinner.
Your old lady’s downstairs, eating cat food.

10/10

The Middle 8.07

But your mom is my lady.
First, she’d have to explain what audacity means.
Everyone there was dark and tense.
You may not be deep or dark, but the world is already full of darkness.
It’s not you that wasn’t ready for New York, it was New York that wasn’t ready for you.

5/10

The Middle 8.09

Now I’ll just have to be a bridesmaid for Cindy and wear a formal dress and a Safari hat. I’ve researched grounds for marriage annulment in the state of Indiana. There’s not being of age, suspicion of fraud, if one or both parties are mentally unstable.
Bingo.
That one.

10/10

Shut Eye 1.01

Kadee Strickland is wonderful in it!

Got a guy who owes me, fuck that, he’s the guy.
God came to the gypsy guy and told him that his theft had saved Jesus from the nail in the heart. To repay him, God gave the gypsies the right to steal.
Cause they’re bitches. Bitches are assholes.
I’m done being someone’s bitch.

9.5/10

This is Us 1.02

The eating disorder plot of the show is what keeps it all special.  Castle’s Esposito married his best friend’s wife, played by Mandy Moore’s character. At this point we don’t know where Jess from Gilmore Girls is.

They call him Webster, you know that show where white family adopts a black baby?
I love that show!
Can we spend one fat-free night?
Man, I only ate fruit today.
I wasn’t a good brother, was I?
It’s okay, you still have time.
Randall is not free of vice, his vice is his goodness.
It’s his compulsive drive to be perfect.
It’s always gonna be about the weight. Even when I’m not thinking about it, I’m thinking about it. Will this chair hold me, will this dress fit me. It’s just at the core of who I am, deep inside.
This dress fits you in all the right places.
This old thing? I just threw it on. I didn’t even think about it.

10/10

This is Us 1.03

We should give him a new name.

6/10

This is Us 1.04

Children are just heartless, and I absolutely adored Milo’s reaction.

I was so nervous I started doing a British accent in the middle of it.
We don’t want you to play with us anymore. You embarrass us.
I almost drowned, do you even care? You’re so busy making sure that Kate isn’t eating too much and Randall is not too adopted and where’s Kevin? Oh wait, he’s dead.
Do you think my son could play with your son sometime after school?
So you stalked her like a serial killer.
Do you want to be with a skinny person?
All of your life you’ve been fat.
I gained 90 pounds the year after she left.
I did consider suicide, a lot.
I had this little notebook and every time I met a black person, I would put a mark in this notebook.
The fact that my daughter doesn’t find anything weird about her playing a snow white, that’s the whole idea.
He’s my biological father.

10/10

This is Us 1.05

Milo’s character is dead?

When I get a script, the first thing I do is paint.
Our dad is not with us, he’s not alive anymore, but he’s with us, he’s with me every day.It’s just us.

5/10

SVU Season 18 So far

20 Tuesday Dec 2016

Posted by in special victims unit, tv series

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This is how I rated the show over the first 4 months. Surprisingly only 6 episodes aired this half season, and lets be honest, not all of them were good.

  1. 9.5
  2. 5
  3. 8
  4. 10
  5. 10
  6. 3.5

Giving us a total of 46 points, divided by 6 episodes = 7.7/10

Some of the best episodes of the season so far included episode 1, when a little boy points a gun at Olivia and her son at Central Park and episode 4, when we find out Amanda’s sister Kimmy suffers from bipolar disorder

The best moments and quotes of the season include:

  • Olivia’s ‘fed up with perps’ attitude from episode 1
  • A teenager is obsessed with Amanda and lied to please her and Amanda said it was not her fault he has a crush on her
  • A mom decides to sleep with an admissions officer to get her son into a prestigious university, what’s worse, the man turns out to be a con
  • ‘He thinks that because he’s in love with a transgender woman that he’s gay.’

Shameless 7.10. The Middle 8.08. The Goldbergs 4.09. The Goldbergs 4.10. Scream Queens 2.07. Scream Queens 2.08. Scream Queens 2.09. Younger 3.11. Younger 3.12. The Simpsons 28.09. The Simpsons 28.10. Divorce 1.10

17 Saturday Dec 2016

Posted by in divorce, shameless, the goldbergs, the middle, the simpsons, tv series, younger

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I watched season 1 of Damages, it was so long and boring, I decided to quit when the main murder got resolved as the result was just disappointing.

How did you like Fuller House? Wasn’t season 2 so good? Kimmy stole the spotlight yet again. There has to be a third season.

Shameless 7.10

There’s something about this season that makes it not so enjoyable. They’re not pulling enough ‘shameless’ fast ones. Sure Frank slept with Fiona’s elderly friend with dementia. Debbie did beg on the street and Monica did take a baseball bat to the other grandparents house, but what about Ian and Lip? Lip kept proving everyone he’s Frank’s son, Carl disappeared off to military school (wtf he was just in juvie last season) and Ian was the only one who had his shit together and dates a nice transgender man. Fiona’s storyline is boring, Frank’s too, Kev and Vi’s is just plain awful. Why did they move this season 4 months up only to give us this disappointment. Where the fuck is Sheila, we need her.

Mickey is back and he is heading to Mexico. Oh yeah and Monica is back too. I rememeber her having that meth selling boyfriend last season but what the f happened to her lesbian lover? Frank and Monica rob a Bingo bus and try to rob a bank too. They writers made it look that Lip’s teacher is responsible for his drinking problem as he ended up drunkinly breaking into her home. Despite all this craziness, Ian said something right on point.

I’m nuts. Mickey’s fucking nuts.
I’m on CTP. Colored people time.
Love is raw and destructive.
Milkoviches? I think one of them robbed us back in the 80s. If the cops pick up the Milkoviches, tell them we want our VCR back.
Am I stupid?
Fuck her, you’re a sweetheart.
That OJ lawyer is already dead.
Have you thought what would have happened if you ran off with Jimmy/Steve?
Lying sociopath Jimmy Steve? My life would be a non-stop psycho thriller.
What of nothing ever gives you the same thrill again?
You turned your life around. Mickey would set a match to it. You’ve done really great without him and I’m really fucking proud of you.
Lip, you broke into my home. Jesus, Lip, you’ve got to move one, please. Get some help.

10/10

The Middle 8.08

The rating for The Middle are not the best this season, but It’s still well in the 6mln. Axl and April got married…for one episode. First average episode in ages.

And that weird one that reads.
That one’s mine.

3.5/10

The Goldbergs 4.09

I feel like they have ran out of ideas. The whole season is a snoozeville. Here, Murray has his Birthday and he sleeps through the surprise birthday party Bev threw him. Adam and Big Tasty have a quarell, after Adam starts getting into basketball.

Before you get mad, you should lay down on those coats It’s amazing.
Which baby is this?
The moron.
Wow, these receipts really mean a lot to you.
I  should be in the moment more.
If you start liking basketball, then who am I?

3.5/10

The Goldbergs 4.10

At least we got to hear Hayley Orrantia sing, and she has such a wonderful voice. Love Sick is definitely my most played song in 2016, and I love Unitil Then and Strong and Southern and Silence You and I am waiting for Hayley’s EP.

What am I watching?
The duck is gonna make it with that lady, what have you brought us to?!
A lady and a duck in bed. Who the fuck thought this was a good idea?!
You replaced my favorite posters.
That’s my baby!

3.5/10

Scream Queens 2.07

I saw the ratings and there is no way this show is not getting cancelled after next week’s season finale. Season one was fresh and exciting, and despite being badly written, it kept you occupied after just finishing a new episode of SVU. Season 2 on the other hand? Nothing makes sense, the killer got revealed halfway through, it has so many unnecessary characters, they’re killing off all the original characters and oh boy it just sucks. Grandfathered’s ratings last year were twice as good and the show got canceled. Scream Queens only had 2 million followers per episode, but most likely Fox didn’t cancel it because they wanted to keep Jamie Lee Curtis in the family.

He’s a psychopath and his most likely profession a serial killer.
Most Americans use the same password for everything.
His password is I went to Harvard.
I’m gonna put you on an antiobesity drug called Orlistat.
I’m pretty sure I just saw Hester, yeah, from the Netflix documentary. The head nurse is obviously a drug addict and Cathy Much thinks she’s a doctor.

6.5/10

Scream Queens 2.08

We learned that Grace has been locked up in a mental institution this whole time.

Emma Roberts Snapchatting during sex with Uncle Jesse, oh lord. We all know at least one person who does it and it’s just unappropriate, but here, entertaining.
Are you texting?
Snapchatting.
Snapchatting?
I don’t know maybe take sex classes?
I’ll just lay here listening to Spotify.
During that Katy Perry/Taylor Swift feud, she sided with Katy!
Not when my daughter was locked ypo in a mental insitution because o fwhat they did to her.
You said she went to Stanford.
Stanford Mental Asylum.
How come they get to be doctors while my little Grace gets locked up.

4/10

Scream Queens 2.09

Brooke Shields guest stars just to get poisoned and give the Channels her TV Show.

I don’t want to die in this outfit!
We want to be TV doctors, not real doctors.
I don’t give a rat’s ass about that cow Number 3.
You have 8 hours to complete the exam.
I think the answer is B, better luck next time!
I am  a genius and no one cares.
Damn it, number 5, shut up!
Where’s number 5.
I don’t know, probbaly taking a huge nervous dump somewhere.
We’re not surprised she got poisones. It was probably one of the PAs she fired for farting.
Di you just offer us our own show?
I’ll be dead in a month.

7.5/10

Younger 3.11

Liza and Charles almost hook up and this is how it should be! I wish she just told him the truth right there.

We need to tweet, instagram and Snapchat our asses off this weekend!
Liza, I know you’re 40.
Either you publish my book, or I’ll publish your story.
Advice from her?
No, advice from her dog.
Just put 10 people in a tight corner , take a picture and this party will look crowded too..
My babysitter got me into them.
I like you.

5/10

Younger 3.12

Liza told Kelsey the truth! I didn’t like how or where it happened, but it’s okay. I guess if Josh found out at the end of season 2, Kelsey at the end of season 3, then Charles will when season 4 ends. I hope season 4 starts in early spring.

I’m sure you know how fond I am of you.
They say life starts when you’re 40.
You didn’t consider me at all!
No restrictions, no pressure. This is you. The real you.
What will make you happy?
Losing weight.
What will make you happy?
A divorce!
I just want my wofe back.
Just call her.
You’re a liar and a cheater. Your lies are hurting everyone around you.
This is my daughter, she’s in college. And ‘m not 26. I will be 41 in a couple of weeks.
I don’t undrstand.
Then let me explain.

10/10

The Simpsons 28.09

This episode was a blur. I don’t remember much of it, except for Homer getting injured at work after Mr. Burns throws him down his chute.

SueSA.
How could I have forgotten to sue Mr. Burnes?

4/10

The Simpsons 28.10

Oh boy, at least Maggie kicked some elf’s ass.

1/10

Divorce 1.10

Robert called cops on Frances! The only good thing about this episode. The daughter is hit by a car and no one even tries to tell the son not to blame himself, they just chat about it among themselves. This is what’s wrong with the show.

2/10

This Is Us 1.01. The Goldbergs 4.08. Younger 3.09. Younger 3.10. The Simpsons 28.08. Divorce 1.07. Divorce 1.08. Divorce 1.09

11 Sunday Dec 2016

Posted by in divorce, the goldbergs, the simpsons, this is us, tv series, younger

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This is Us 1.01

I have found my new Parenthood! Woah what a great show! I cried through most of it, just like during Parenthood! It’s beautiful and I was nicely surprised with how the three storylines are connected! It’s the best show this Fall.

Average human being shares their birthday with 18 mln other human beings.
Do not dare eat this cake before your party, Kate. Love, Kate.
Seriously, what is wrong with you?
This is a low point.
How did I get here? How the hell did I get here? I had this whole dream life that I have imagined for myself. A real career. Look at me, Kev. I ate my dream life away.
Tell me to stop feeling sorry for myself. Tell me to lose the damn weight!
Lose the damn weight.
I’m gonna lose the damn weight.
You want to be fat friends?
Sure, but I’m gonna lose the damn weight.
I can’t fall for a fat person right now.
I’ll lose the weight then.
You want to meet your grandchildren?
I have a thing for Sally Field.
I am 36 and this is not a very pretty picture.
This is the funny fat guy from fat class?
Yes, I am and it’s a support group.
We lost the third baby, I’m very sorry. He was stillborn. There was nothing anyone could have done.
You have two beautiful healthy children. A boy and a girl, but we did lose the third child.
Which one is yours?
None of them, someone left a newborn in my fire station.

10/10

The Goldbergs 4.08

Beverly becomes Erica’s Home Economic sub teacher and Adam gets one of the leads in Phantom of the Opera.

I don’t follow.
Neither do I, I lead.
She’s been scraping and couponing just to save enough money for you to go to any college you chose.

5.5/10

Younger 3.09

What is happening to this show, this season is awful.

I’ve never bought a bathing suit from a vending machine.

1.5/10

Younger 3.10

Oh sweet lord, so it CAN get even worse?! Point for the pregnancy dilemma.

0.5/10

The Simpsons 28.08

What is this chore monkey app and where can I get it?!

Isn’t it a little sexist to expect me to do all the carpeting?
You are finishED.
You should use the Chore Monkey app. People do all your chores and you’re free to follow your dreams.
This is the beginning of an unhealthy dependence.
I wouldn’t say it was a hostage situation.
I bet you wish you were back in your kitchen.
I am in my kitchen.
Then life is good. Am I right?
For you, I’ll get one without a criminal record.
You made that for me?
No, used to be OJ’s. Yeah, little Juice!
He calls my buttocks, ass.

7.5/10

Divorce 1.07

A family member taking out loans was very relatable, all of it.

What was that about every morning, the giggles, the big smiles, and the hi Robets, the extra shots, the obvious bent over to pick up a dime that you’ve dropped for my benefit.
He has left you both deep in debt.
He also took out some loans.
He remorgaged your house and then he took more loans.
I don’t deserve this.
You purches a two bedroom that was a siht of a triple homicide, yes or no, Rbert?
It’s the fact that you gambled your kids future!

5/10

Divorce 1.08

One good enough episode and we’re back to this? Sarah rolling her eyes as Robert saiid every day is special with his kids. The show reminds me of SDwx and the City not because of Sarah Jessica Parker, but because of all the sex references.

She’s a slut, drinking water cause she’s so thirsty from all the good fucking she’s gotten.
As a French men would do.

2/10

Divorce 1.09

Roberts is served with divorce papers at his daughter’s game.

There’s only ne guy here who doesn’t look like he cries when he comes.
We’re all sitting here with dicks in our hands.
You condensating fuck.
You dirty puta.

3.5/10